The Breakfast Club

Anyone who goes to McGill will reluctantly be forced to admit that we're a rather elitist bunch. I seem to have made matters worse for myself by choosing two majors that are particularly good at attracting people with a "holier then thou" attitude: art history and political science respectively. Focusing on the art history department, if you choose to take an art history class you will inevitably be faced with 5 main types of students, and something to look forward to:

1) The suck up: Every class has one. This person generally aspires to become a professor and is therefore on a first name basis with yours. They’ll start their sentences with things like “As you know professor x, the reading states that...”
In an effort to seem smarter, they’ll often bring in knowledge from other art history classes that they are simultaneously taking. The proff might not be aware of this fact, but every other student in the room is. Nice try bud. We’re onto you.

2) The fashionista: Half of the people in art history are not actually interested in art. Why, you may wonder, do they choose to study it then? These girls/boys are generally the people who are too proud to attend a school that might actually offer the fashion merchandising program they so desire (Ryerson, Concordia, Parsons, you get the idea). Instead they choose to get a degree from the most sought after school in the country, hoping their pedigree will land them an automatic job at Conde Naste upon graduation. The fashionista won’t actually ever speak in class. They’ll just spend four years looking fierce while they anxiously await their diploma.

3) The art snob: This person probably starts their sentences with things like “When I was interning at the Tate Modern in London…..” or “When I was backpacking through Europe following the retrospective of x (insert obscure artist that even your proff has never heard of)…”
When in the presence of this person, never mention the following: Picasso, Monet, Pollock, or anything considered too proletariat for their superior artistic knowledge. More importantly, under no circumstances should you ever admit to liking Andy Warhol. To the Art Snob, this is the equivalent of saying you think Pineapple Express is Oscar worthy. You have just confirmed their lingering suspicion that you have no taste.

4) One hit wonder: This is the person in lecture class who never speaks but will at one point put up his or her hand and say something so profound about Richard Serra/feminist theory/politics of display/whatever, that the whole class (including the proff) will actually stop to contemplate what was just said. The one hit wonder will then subsequently remain silence for the rest of term. You’re not too sure who they are or where they came from. All you know is, you wish they would talk more and the art snob/suck up would talk less.

5) The Bro: this is the heterosexual football playing, former beer pong champion that is in your art history class purely by accident. He originally thought that intro to modern art and art of listening required the same level of academic commitment, or lack thereof.
The bro thinks that talking about art is a subjective practice where there are no “right” or “wrong” answers. Essentially, he’s doomed from the start. You won’t actually see this guy in your class until he shows up for your midterm and realizes that “Shit man, this shit is harder then I thought.”

Ranting aside, I’m pretty sure I’ve embodied all of the aforementioned stereotypes, but for what it’s worth, I do kind of like Warhol. Just don’t tell ok?